Drift…

I am married to a drifter…

Not the kind that goes from town to town looking for poor, helpless souls to swindle.

Nope.

My man is a highway drifter.

Perhaps you’ve seen one:  while driving, the drifter goes from the yellow line to the white line to the yellow line to the white line.

Yep, that’s my man.

(Just to clarify, it doesn’t happen all the time!) It usually happens when we are driving through a particularly scenic location.  You know, there are just sooooo many things to see in this great land–and sometimes, that seeing results in the car veering to the side on which he is looking (or the opposite side, it just depends!).

We haven’t had a drifting accident–though there have been a few close calls with mailboxes and ditches…

Anyway, on one such drifting occasion, after I shook my head in a judgmental way and not quite believing drifting had happened again, God placed some thoughts in my head, some surprising thoughts.

God told me that I was a drifter, too (cue the serious music–duh,duh, dum!).

Not the swindling kind or the driving kind.

Nope, mine is a different kind.

My drifter-ness has happened gradually–I have found myself drifting from God.

Let me set the scene:  once I was deeply involved in ministry at my church.  Once I only listened to Christian music on the radio.  Once I attended church regularly.  Once I wrote on this blog weekly, and studied the Bible constantly in order to do that writing.  Once I found great joy in fellow-shipping with other believers.  Once I had a close, healthy relationship with Jesus.  Once…

Do you see the picture?

These were activities that I enjoyed, activities that were meaningful, activities that brought me closer to God.  Why on earth would I drift away from them?

One answer–I didn’t notice because it all happened so gradually.  Drift…

You know, the ministry is going fine without me.  It’s time for me to step back.  Drift…

You know how much I love music–this is music from my younger days.  They are such catchy songs, and I enjoy thinking about where I was and what I was doing.  And, I know all the words…  Drift…

You know, I’ve had a rough week (a tiring week, a frustrating week, a great week).  It won’t hurt to stay home from church this week.  Drift…

You know, no one really reads what I write anyway.  It will be good for me to take the break.  Drift…

You know, there will be plenty of people at that gathering.  They won’t miss me, and I can get some things done at home.  Drift…

You know, my relationship with Jesus is just fine.  There are no problems at all… Drift.

What was happening in my life was similar to what happens to my man.  There are so many things to see, so many temptations, so many activities…that I let my heart and soul follow in the same direction that I was looking.  I never even realized it…

…until that day in the truck…when God spoke words to my soul that I never thought I’d hear.

You (me) have taken your eyes off Me (God).

Interestingly enough, I had recently attended a church service where the pastor used Colossians 3:2 as part of his text.  The words stirred something in my heart even then (now I know why). Take a look…

set

That verse came rushing back to me.  I had fallen short, very short, of these words.  And another verse also came to mind during that service and again in the truck…

fixing

My sweet, I had moved my focus away from God. I had stopped setting my mind on heavenly things.  I had stopped fixing my eyes on Jesus.

I had drifted… not consciously, but little by little, I moved…

I wish I could tell you that after those moments of realization and repentance came a wonderfully new outlook on life.   Yes, there were some great moments of “Ah-ha!”, but there are still areas where I am struggling to switch my focus.

That’s the thing about drifting…when you do it, sometimes it’s so much easier to just stay in that lane, in that train of thought, in that activity (or non-activity) pattern.

I am more aware of what has been happening, though I am not sure exactly how to stop it in some areas of my life.  Some changes are easy–listen to more praise music, start attending church regularly, find time to write at least once a week, move closer to Jesus through study.  I praise God for showing me the drift, and I have started to implement those fixes. The two hardest areas, ministry and fellowship, were the ones where drifting didn’t really bother me as much.  Those I think will be harder to “fix.”  I just have to remember our verses– set my heart on heavenly things and fix my eyes on Jesus.   Maybe that drifting had to happen with those two in order to show me new ways to serve and be involved with people, new methods to “set” and “fix.”  I wait to see…

Meanwhile, my dear, I urge you take a good look at your life.  Are you drifting in areas that you aren’t even aware?  Could you be moving away from God in subtle, gradual ways?  If so, please take my experience to heart.  Study these Scriptures that God used in my life, and apply them to yours.  Go to Him and have a real heart-to-heart about the health of your heart.

 It will be hard to hear, it will be tough to acknowledge, it will be difficult to believe.  

But it will only be then that you, and me, can begin to move away from being a drifter and move forward as a sold-out follower, with a heart focused on heavenly things and eyes fixed on Jesus.

And that’s really what we are called to be.

 

 

Advertisements

Tell me what you think!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: